Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Smooth Move

I am never late.

Ok,"never" may be extreme. I suppose there has been the rare occurrence that some extenuating circumstance beyond my control may have made me the slightest bit late for something once or twice. But, in general, I am never late. Nothing brings me more pleasure than arriving exactly two minutes early. Ok, "nothing" may be extreme. I suppose there are other events that are more pleasurable, but that's for another post.

Today, I was to arrive at North Lancaster Kaiser at exactly 3:15pm for a doctor's appointment to be fitted with a brace for my ankle. My torn ligament needed some support. Grabbing my crutch and daughter, I hopped into the car at just the perfect time, factoring in the late afternoon traffic for my route.

To my horror, as I was traveling down Keubler toward I-5, I realized I hadn't shaved my legs in at least two, yes, maybe even three days. At a stop light, I confirmed that I did indeed have mild to moderate stubble on the very ankle that was to be examined.

In a panic I checked the clock, calculating the risk of turning back home to remedy the situation. Too risky. I would perhaps be late. I couldn't take that chance. My mind raced as I stayed on course, picturing the apologies I would be making to the doctor, nurse and x-ray tech for my unsightly stubble. This was not acceptable.

Thinking ahead on my route, I realized that I would be passing right by the Walgreen's on the corner of Lancaster and Sunnyslope. Could I do it? I wondered. It would all depend upon the traffic between my exit and Lancaster. It would have to be a perfectly smooth operation.

The traffic on Market was heavier than I'd hoped, but as I finally turned onto Lancaster, I saw that perhaps I could actually pull this off.

I rolled into the Walgreen's parking lot and hobbled into the store. An employee saw the look of desperation on my face and came to my aid. She directed me to the razors and even opened her register so that I didn't have to wait in line at the other.

I returned to my car in a matter of minutes, got back onto Lancaster, and shaved my right leg, toes to knee, while waiting at the stoplight at Sunnyslope, using a bottle of hand sanitizer that I had in my car.

It stung a bit, but crisis averted. I hobbled up to the check-in counter at Kaiser at exactly 3:13pm. Mission accomplished.

24 comments:

Lindsay said...

You are too, too funny! I'm sure there are many of us who have had that similar feeling of horror - but I don't know many who would actually do something about it. :)
Glad you made it on time (EARLY)!

Anonymous said...

I'm with you on this one, both the shaving and the driving. I love getting places just on time. I have a keen sense of just when to leave so I can make it there a few minutes early. I don't have it down to two minutes though-so you are the winner of precision arrivals!

Yesterday I made myself get all ready in the morning because I knew I was going to the church later for a very important appointment-right Julie? Normally when I don't feel well I just put my hair up and don't worry about any make up. I was the prettiest sick girl ever though, because I had to do everything as normal.

Everyone says they are sure doctors don't care about stuff like that....but I don't believe it.

Julie said...

You are crazy! But we already know that, right?? What I want to know is did the sanitizer end up giving you a rash??

I love it that you're an "on Time" kind of girl! (And Leslie, too)...

What's with the classical music playing on your blog right now?? I feel like I'm watching "Little Einsteins" with Lily ;) That's some kind of mix you've got goin' on!! Not too rough ...

Sharon said...

Lindsay, you have just solidified your status as Official Farm Girl! You posted that comment at 3:48am!! I had JUST published this post about an hour before that, during a middle of the night extended potty break! I went back to bed until 8am, but were you already up for the day??? Wow~that's impressive!

Lindsay said...

:) laughing right now!!

** it's called a hungry baby
... so I figured I could multi-task and enjoy some quiet blog time as well as quality time with Mack!
I did notice that you posted at some crazy time in the middle of the night... but thought that maybe, just maybe, you liked staying up late like my dear friend Angela. (I think she posted at a crazy time once too... if not, she will) :)

oh, and I was back up at 5:30... lucky you getting to sleep until 8.

Angela said...

I am stressed out just reading this! :)
I hate to be late.
I am so glad that you made it. Like you said mission accomplished!

Rachel said...

You girls and your middle of the night blogging are making me tired!!!!
I can totally relate about the having to be on time (I'm ALWAYS early for everything) but you've got me at the razor thing. You're a much better person than me...I just figure that's part of making the big bucks...dealing with other people's stubbly legs!!

AngieG said...

I would have been 3 minutes late with my stubble and thought they should all be glad to see me! I admire your committment though!

Glory Laine said...

I had a physical reaction when I read, shaving with sanitizer gel. Your Dr should send you a thankyou note for your efforts to spare her the horror of stubble.

Anonymous said...

I'm with AngieG, I would've left the hair intact. Better yet, I wouldn't have even thought about my stubbly leg hair or even felt remotely gross for waltzing into the dr's office for all to see or deal with. Dr's have seen many far worse things that I'm sure stubbly leg hair would've been warmly welcomed with a hug!

But...KUDOS to you, Sharon, for pulling off Walgreens and shaving while driving on your way to your appt and for making it on time!

HappyMomma2 said...

So sad that I knew you would stop at that precise place before I continued reading your blog-to find out you did stop there. Your music makes me crazy-its too high strung for my stressed out body. As for the hair on my legs-I would have been prepared, but if I had forgotten, I would've had to bite the bullet and release. Can't sweat the small stuff. But brushing my teeth before the dentist and taking a shower before the yearly a must!

February Jill said...

I guess I don't fit in here because I would have never considered showing up to the doctor's office early with freshly shaven legs. They make me wait when I get there anyway... plus apparently I am one of the outcasts who cares little for punctuality. I try to care, but it just doesn't work.

Lion Heart said...

this had me cracking up! Sharon! Sanitizer gel-ouch! That is way brave.

Alida said...

I so meant to speak with you today. I saw you sitting at MOPs with that smile and completely forgot about your poor ankle. What a trooper you are. I can totally relate. I shaved my legs everyday in my ninth month of pregnancy...just in case. The funny thing is with my second child...as I'm pushing the horrible realization that I didn't get a pedicure set in.

(It was just for a mere moment and then I realized I was having a baby and that really didn't matter...that much.)

Molly said...

I can't even shave my legs in the shower, let alone in the drivers seat of a car. I wish Greta had video footage of it. Amazing.

Congratulations on a mission well accomplished. Thanks for the great visual too!

Hosmerita said...

oooook,
I know what to get you for Christmas. An electric rasor for the car. (the first time I typed rasor I typed raisin,just had to share)
I got a funny e-mail awhile back about getting ready for the Gyno. This lady realised at the last minute that she hadn't showered before her appt so she grabbed a washcloth off the tub and well ya know.
Anyways, she got to the gyno and he took a looksy and he made some stange comment like, "Wow someone made an extra effort today!"
So the lady was completely freaked out, got home and her 5 year old asked her where her special washcloth was, the one on the corner of the tub, the one with all the glitter in it!


I just about died! Can you imagine that doctor's thoughts!

It was nice to see your smile from afar yesterday. Hope the brace is helping.

momaof4 said...

To funny, I just shaved today, cuase it was pointed out by my hubby that my hair was almost as long as his.....
But I would shave before the Doc. When my water broke I showered and shaved before we went to the hospital!!! So, I guess I live in both worlds.

LizzyG said...

This was hilarious! You go girl...mission accomplished!!!

Team Johnston said...

You are too funny, Coach! :) Good job making to your appointment on time (even early). I hate to be late too. I would rather be really early to something instead of being late.
~Danielle :)

Unknown said...

Ok, this is hilarious! I can honestly say, I am rarely on time and I would never have shaved my legs in the car! :) In fact, these days its getting rather difficult to shave my legs? Any shaving-your-legs-while-pregnant advice?? Anyone?

Hosmerita said...

Meghan,
Scaryscary, but Richard shaved my legs for me when I got to be the size of a house. That is also when the electric rasor comes in handy. you can't slice and dice with that thing.

Valerie of Momia said...

First of all, you're crazy. I know I'm not the first to say this, but this is the first thing that ran through my head.

Ummm...if it's been only 2 or (gasp!) 3 days since I last shaved...it's a great week. Orrr...maybe a great month. I'm not a fan of shaving my legs (pits are another story). After my c-section, I wasn't able to lean over at all. Shaving my legs was out of the question for several weeks. I got over it. Even though I was hairy for that wonderful 6 week post baby appointment, there was nothing I could do short of getting someone else to shave my legs. I'll probably be having another baby in the next two years. Do I have any takers??? ;)

Valerie of Momia said...

Oh, and congrats on getting to the doctor exactly two minutes early even with your minor road block, Mrs. Type A! ;)

Jenny vick said...

oh man! I laughed till I nearly cried. What an impressive Risk for the sake of presenting a clean slate for your brace! Good work.

jenny (you left a comment on my "worship" blog...now I'm reading yours! This blog world is like that ;) )